Maybe Baby Sister Update

As the world of adoption is so unknown we have tried to keep that unknown alive for the boys.  We didn't want to promise anything we couldn't be sure would happen.  Since we first started even talking about a new sibling we have emphasized that we don't know for sure what will happen and only God knows if we will actually complete this adoption.  We often sing "He's Got the Whole World In His Hands" to the boys as we put them to bed.  Sometime this year I started a verse, "He's got our maybe baby sister in his hands".  This caught on and when Yared prays about her or talks about her he calls her maybe baby sister.  I love it.  I know it is a bit sad as it shows that we have shared some of our adoption concerns but it also makes me happy that he has jumped on board with our cautious optimism.  This is how Ben and I have chosen to approach adoption.  Admittedly it was much much harder for me to be so casual about things the first time around.  I was all consumed with being a Mom and wasn't sure if it was ever going to happen.  Then once we had pictures of the boys, I literally ached with pain if I thought I wouldn't get them home to us.  But right now we are in the waiting stage of adoption.  We aren't matched to a specific child.  For clarity's sake let me tell you where we are in our adoption.

First you complete a home study to make sure that your home and family is fit to have another child in it.  Wouldn't it be nice if EVERYONE had to have one of these.  There are some seriously unfit families out there.

Second you complete your dossier.  Basically a ton of paperwork proving to Ethiopia that you are who you say you are and that you can offer a good home to a child.  This takes FOREVER.  You have 20 items you need to gather.  Each must be a certified original or notarized.  Then they all go to the state level to have a seal saying they are originals or that the notary is the real deal.  Finally they get sent to the Federal level to have the state seals authenticated. This wouldn't be a hassle for a family that doesn't move as much as we do.  We were dealing with four states and the British government thanks to my British birth certificate.

Third you mail in your dossier.  It gets translated into Amharic and then you are ready to accept a referral. You can wait anywhere from a few months to a year.  We are hoping for a short wait time.  Prayer would be useful here:).

Fourth you get a referral and chose whether or not to accept.. duh who wouldn't. All we know is that we will receive a referral for a girl between ages of 0 and 3 years of age.

Fifth we wait for a court date. Once that is obtained we fly to Addis Ababa for court and hopefully pass the first time.

Sixth we come home without our baby girl and wait for our embassy date.  This is generally a few weeks to two months so they can get her passport together and clear everything on that side of things so  that once she comes home she is ours forever.  

We just completed step three.  Often we get asked if our process is any easier as we have adopted through Ethiopia before.  Nope!!  That doesn't help us at all.  We have to redo our birth certificates, marriage certificates, everything.  Nothing can be used a second time.  The only advantage is that you know what you are taking on when you take on the paperwork.   I guess this could be considered a disadvantage but I want to be positive:).

The way I feel about this adoption is so so different.  I feel like a whole different person going through this.  I am not in that desperate Mommy mode.  I am so blessed, so happy and so content with our lovely sons that I truly know that I will be fine if this adoption fell through.  I would grieve and move on.  I am not attached to any specific child yet.  But at the same time I love being a Mom so much.. probably because the boys make it so much fun... that I can't wait to be a mom again.  One minute I am relishing the freedom of having older kids running in the back yard unsupervised and the next I am missing holding and snuggling a little toddler.  I go from the thrill of starting with baby/toddler stuff again to the terror of attachment issues, diapers and the great unknown what if we do get an infant.  Nati was 19 months when we got him.  Ben and I are CLUELESS with babies.  But I find I like this adoption roller coaster much more than the last.  I am so happy where I am in life that I feel content with whatever happens.  I hope for a sweet baby girl to come into our home as I think we have a lot of love to offer.  I know she will get a Mom who adores her.  She will get an amazing Dad who will be the biggest softie for her.  I know she will score the BEST two big brothers in the world.  I know they are the reason we want more kids.  They are amazing.

Fair, family fun and turning five

This last weekend we once again got to head up to my folks place in Mariposa for the county fair.  This is a bit of a family tradition and we are thrilled to be back in CA and able to join in on the fun.  The boys and I went up early to spend some extra time with Nana and Babu.  Also my aunt and uncle were visiting from England so we got to see them a bit longer as well.  Ben joined us on Friday by hitching a ride with my brother.  We had the majority of the family there as one of sisters and two neices also came.  The weather had cooled down a bit so this fair was probalby the most fun yet as we weren't roasting hot.  I love the fair, I love family fun, and I love Birthdays so this was one fun weekend.  I'll be quite now and let you see it through pictures. 

My dad has traveled a lot and collects hats.  The boys wanted to know where they were all from.  They would have tried them all on if they were allowed but as I said my Dad has a LOT of hats.  Here they are in a Russian fur hat and and Indian head dress.  

What made this trip to Nana and Babu's extra special was having Ben with us.  The boys were thrilled to have their giant playmate around.

 We celebrated Nati's Birthday all weekend and he has another friend party at the end of this month. I think we might be creating a Birthday Monster.  My mom made this awesome scavenger hunt with paintings.  She knew he couldn't read yet so she had painted pictures of all the clues. He knew them all except the rock garden that he thought was an ice-cream cone:).  I can't get this silly picture to rotate so you'll have to rotate your head to see the pictures.

Here he is finding a clue on the back of the house.

 My oldest nephew Cameron was a huge help in saving the pictures and keeping the fun going.  Of course Ben and Yared had to do it on a bike.

 The little ones getting a ride up the steep hill to the last clue.

 The loot was his presents.

 Cousin love!!

 We had a huge mid day BBQ so we wouldn't eat too much junk at the fair that night.  My brother the chef.

 My crazy uncle Brian.  I wish they didn't live so far away.

 Mariah was also celebrated again with an ice cream cake.

 Then we had car cup cakes for Nati.  Ben posed for my artsy shot here.  We did cars as we were going to a demolition derby that night at the fair.

 He declared that he needed a badge so everyone would know he was five.

 My Auntie Ann who made the lovely badge.

 Last year there was much crying and sobbing as he was too small for the Bumper cars.  Not this year.

 Waiting for the little ones to finish up their ride tickets.

 Inside was a game where you won oil supplies if you pledged to recycle your oil.  The funnels became hats.

 Nati won a oil can and carried it around proudly telling Daddy that he wouldn't share it him.

 The balloon lady made him a sword.

 The gang waiting for the demolition derby to start.  It was a fun one.  I liked seeing my proper British Aunt and Uncle jump up and cheer too.

 The noise makes some go a little crazy....

 or if you are 5 and overwhelmed you can manage to sleep through the end and drool down your mom's shoulder.

 Making his car card with Uncle Brian.

 Yared is not afraid of bugs at all and let this praying mantis crawl all over his face.

 On Nati's real Birthday we went out to the Merced river.  We have a miner friend named Bob who lived here for 50 years.  Last year he had to sell his property as he just can't live alone out there anymore.  But he found someone who understands his love of this land and lets him come back with friends to visit any time he wants.  I thought this might be my last time to take some pictures of this amazingly beautiful place.  It is full of his old mining treasures and stuff from the last 50 years.

 The view from where he spent many an afternoon. The river is normally MUCH bigger than this.  But it is still amazing.

 Bob had a great time going "home" for the afternoon and we had fun with him and visiting the river.

Cheeky Birthday Boy.

 That is Nati jumping from about 8 feet high into the river.  There is very little fear in our family aside from Mom freaking out about all the adventures Dad teaches the boys.

 This sums up his personality to a T these days.  He is fun, exasperating, gorgeous, wonderful, stubborn, loving and oh soooo loved.

 My stilly Uncle and I laughing hysterically at my Mom trying to use my huge camera to take a picture.
It was a GREAT weekend and a wonderful way to end the summer.  Truly I am blessed with such a big extended family that I so enjoy, with my three men who make every day exciting and an adventure, with laughter, hope, and so much more.  My cup runneth over.